Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Where is my snickerdoodle?


OH yes. I sorta gave up blogging for a while. I realized it was OK.
I got busy, and most of my quick updates end up at facebook, where get more feedback anyway.
When I get back to writing,  you know, more detailed descriptions of thoughts and other things, I think I'll come back. I'll give this place yet another facelift (new title) and give it a go. No great specific theme or task, just detailed updates WITH thoughts and ideas and unmasked ponderings. And I may copy this to my other live journal blog, because why separate? 
I'm getting tired of separating my posts into different flavors. I spend more time categorizing, updating, and responding than I spend time creating, and THAT my dear silent internet watchers, needs to change.

SO, if you want to get caught up on the basics of whats happening, feel free to check out my latest mailing list sendout: HERE.  (warning: contains promotion and recent work!)

As you can see from the update, there is  a LOT happening.
You can maybe see why I would want to cut out irrelevant internet time or doing useless things like counting grains of sand and letting my A.D.D. take me from task to task to task without really fully finishing any of them.

There is also the financial rollercoaster.
Everyday about 4 things go through my mind:
1.) Crap! Burn EVERYTHING and become a gypsy.
2.) I need to get a solid job to smooth out the bumps in my debt.
3.) Hm.... what of mine can I sell.
4.) Where is my snickerdoodle?

(ok I lied on no. 4. Since that is also the title of this blog entry, does that also mean that this entire entry is a lie? Hmmmm...)

But regardless, it looks as if the seeds I've been sowing are finally starting to sprout.
I'm getting a ton of attention.
People are actually buying things sometimes maybe yeah.  Hell, I'm trying to make art my career, why am I still surprised that people get it? I'm never surprised when I spend the money I don't have on other people's art. I never regret it.
I am determined not to be buried by the numbers that are probably not even that high in the big picture. I'm starting a business, this is expected. I refuse to give in because of fears.  I refuse to get drawn into a false sense of security. I refuse to put my dreams down so I can feel 'safe'.
I have already told myself that at the end of this year I shall re-evaluate my priorities and if I feel that I need to look for other work, I shall do so, but I shall be picky and determined to do something will still allow me to keep the art career's best interests in mind. It may seem selfish and spoiled to some. It may seem heroic to others. Personally, I just gotta do what I gotta do.
IS THIS STARTING TO SOUND like a rant and justification?
I think I'll stop before I ramble myself into incoherentness.

I shall just have to trust that I'm on the right path. 

ALSO, Here, have a random bit of art prose that I have no intention of doing anything with.

 "Modern Attention far from Detention
one of the doomed masses
waiting for a mention. 

Carving my own Path. 
The fastesst way to the  
             The Poorhouse.
Trying to soar on pennies, they
just weigh me Down. 
I can watercolor my troubles
away, rub over them with 
acrylic. Suffocate it with tape and medium, drips 
and forgetfulness."

EDIT:  BY THE WAY, this was neither in my mailing list update or here so far!
Last night Dave and I went to see the Devil's Carnival in Indy. It was local, how could we NOT go and see Terrance and Darren again? We also had an awesome after dinner with some friends at the local greasy spoon.
Anyway, Dave won the costume contest, and Darren has tasked me to do some Devil's Carnival inspired art. GOOD. Now I have an even better excuse to draw broken freaky circus characters. *GRIN*
Today I took another look at Terrance's Blog, which very directly inspired me to write again. 

--- ok back to art.---


  1. Well spoken, my love. See I told you, you CAN write! And it should be no surprise that people are finally taking notice of your talents. You deserve to be noticed. As I am sure the rest of the seeds sprouting soon will show you. You can do this. I love and support you and I will be right there with you.